8 years ago with 5,524 notes | reblog

just-shower-thoughts:

Being a barber, if I ever killed someone, I would just sprinkle the 50 gallon bag of hair we collect every week at the crime scene. Have fun.

8 years ago with 1,566 notes | reblog

rrozeselavy:

thebraveandmischievous:

rrozeselavy:

so the thing about my family is that we have two ancestors on my dad’s side who were buried in france, where I currently live. one died in the spanish civil war, and one died prior doing…we don’t know what. but he somehow managed to get buried in père lachaise. 

so anyhow, my gran sends me a message like “pls put flowers on ur uncle samuel’s grave because he’s gone over a century with none and it will make the ghost mad if he hasn’t already” because my family spends time in europe but never long enough to go all the way to père lachaise and give ya boy samuel jr. his death rites. so im like “ok gran I can do that” bc im a good grandson and you do not fuck with gran she doesn’t DESERVE THAT 

i figure out which plot he’s on and ask someone specifically where you can find uncle samuel jr. and they tell me where and so I arrive at the junction and. 

image

HE GONE. 

image

WHERE DID YOU GO UNCLE SAMUEL. 

image

*celine dion’s smash hit “my heart will go on” playing in the distance* 

in other words either someone stole my entire great great uncle samuel or he has risen again, ready to party in paris for all of eternity. 

You’re pretty chill about a corpse disappearing.

My guy, my dude, he’s been dead since 1851. He could be anywhere. He does what he wants.

(via too-dank-for-you)

  • Me: *Has fun*
  • Me: *loses library card*
  • Me: :/

8 years ago with 4,252 notes | reblog

8 years ago with 319,572 notes | reblog

8 years ago with 694,852 notes | reblog

just-shower-thoughts:

I often go months without finding new music I like, then discover five great songs in one day.

8 years ago with 290 notes | reblog

stupidquestionstoannoypeople:

How do farmers count their sheep without falling asleep

(via the-memedaddy)

just-shower-thoughts:

We totally take advantage of having fingers, but when it comes to toes we basically try to ignore their existence as much as possible.

8 years ago with 366 notes | reblog

8 years ago with 17 notes | reblog